Water Boring

Nothing about torture, I promise.  I was just driving around the neighborhood and thinking that, if I were single, I would check out the sprinkler of my stalkee, before hooking up.   Forget about the car they drive, forget about the 401K, think about the sprinkler.  So, look at this guy above.  I'm thinking very vanilla, never gets his freak on, and you'll find him out there, adjusting that one imperfect sprinkler for the next 40 years.





Um, you can dress it up, but this is the same danged thing as the first guy.  In fact, I would be avoiding this person, because they think that, by putting a pretty turtle on it, they have BLOWN YOUR SPRINKLIN' MIND.  This person is all about presentation and not about content.



Okay, a sense of humor is good, but I'm wondering how far and how deep the wounds in this person go.  This definitely smacks of childhood trauma.  "Daddy, don't put Mr. Crackers on my shoulder!!!  His beak is sharp. Daddy!!!"




Dear God.

Well, this is innovation.  There is some thought going on here about trying to get every angle, address every issue.  It's got a little unpredictability about it.  I could see this person bringing home a bouquet of six or seven types of roses because they wanted to make sure you'd at least like one of them.  

Now, see?  This is what I'm talkin' 'bout.  There is fun.  There is nuttiness, without fright.  There is still practicality, without boredom.  This is the person to stalk.  Get rid of these neighbor kids, put on yer Miracle Suit - you're done.